Not sure if we're going to do it. Not sure if we're even going to stay together.

Maybe it's time to call it a day.

No progress to report this week. It's weird though as I did a straw poll at work of being married v just living together. The people that lived together and then got married said that even if they'd been living together for years that it still felt different. Although I still think it's just a piece of paper, it doesn't imbue your relationship with any mystical properties (otherwise there would be no divorce, right?).
So why do we want to get married? For our families? For a nice day out? For tax breaks? (although these have all but been eroded now). To be right with God? Or maybe it's because we want to honour each other with a special commitment and declare that commitment to all who are important in our lives.

Not going to book the Church this weekend, unless Ray goes alone. Just can't face it. I don't even want to leave the house. We have a social do to go to on Saturday night and I don't want to go.

I sometimes don't even think it's worth bothering getting married. We live together now anyway, so what's the point?

Looks like it's going to be church no. 1. That means we'll have to get up early on Saturday morning to head down to the church hall to register the date. So excited! At least then we'll have a date fixed and something to work around.

Well we have visited two churches on our travels.

Church number 1 - is our Parish church. We quite liked the service and the people were nice and welcoming.

Church number 2 - is within walking distance but not in our Parish. It is in an altogether leafier part of town, whereas Church 1 is right in the town centre. We were met with "Have you come to hear your banns being read?" which implies that the only time that they have young(ish) couples is for weddings. It is quite a popular wedding church as it is very scenic and has a villagey kind of feel. We didn't really feel at our ease there though.

I think having the right kind of vibe from a church is more important than whether it is scenic or not. And Church no.1 is quite a nice stone church. At the moment Church 1 is winning, but there is still one more to see...

I have made my first weddingy purchase - 100 name place cards off ebay. Yes, we haven't even booked a venue, I know, but they were a bargain - £4.20 inc. postage. Confetti are selling them for £2.00 for ten. Bargain!

Ray has finally decided on best man - it's Dave who he used to work with. He called him this afternoon, and it turns out that he's done it before for his brother. My bridesmaid, Hannah, has also done it before. At least that's two people who know what they're doing, because we haven't got a clue!

Both of us really like red so we're going to have lots of red at the wedding. To say it is a "theme" is perhaps stretching the point, but we both like red so there it is.

We have fifteen months to go to the happy day save like mad so we can afford it. But we're planning to keep it nice and local, so that should keep the costs down a bit.

Decided to go ahead with the no kids thing. It's no fun for them, a hassle for their parents and they don't even bring gifts! I'm sure someone will be put out about it, but whatever we do, there will be someone whose nose gets put out of joint.

Ray has decided on a best man, but has to get round to calling him to tell him the happy news. Could take a while.

...arrived today. This is when I'm glad I didn't go for the remortgaging option!

Bizarrely enough the bank have just put up Ray's credit limit to £4600. Between us we can get our hands on £18,000 of instant credit, it is so easy to get into debt these days.

Well after reading one of those wedding mags I can easily see how people rack up huge amounts. You can spend a couple of hundred quid on table favours that people just leave behind anyway.

"Martin proposed to me with a three carat marquise cut dimond ring on a platinum band". Erm, right. I wouldn't expect Ray to remortgage the house for a ring. It's only a symbol, after all. My rock is .30 of a carat, for the record, and I still can't stop admiring how it sparkles.

As for dresses, BHS do a range that start at £60, or you can go up into the thousands.

The internet is full of "make your own" tutorials. I am quite crafty, but tend to lose interest in things, like not picking up a pair of knitting needles in months. But I do usually finish a project once started. Going to try making own invites and stuff. All those cold winter nights when we're staying in saving...

What am I on about? We've not even booked the church yet!

Nothing much has happened. The parents behaved themselves at our little rendez-vous last week. Still haven't booked the church. Have a rough number of invitees (circa 100). That is just family and close friends before anyone suggests "Why not make it close friends and family only?".

Ray had the brilliant idea of banning kids. If getting the numbers down was the main aim, then that would be brilliant. Thing is, kids don't come, the parents won't. Then we'll end up with hardly anyone.

We have arranged for our parents to meet each other on Sunday. I'm glad that I have been so wrapped up in New Job that I have not had time to worry too much about this. Actually, I have no idea what to expect at all.

Ray has booked a table for Sunday lunch at a country hostelry somewhere in darkest Lincolnshire. Figured neutral ground was best for this one.

We told Ray's brother he couldn't come, as he always goes to their mum's for Sunday lunch, so he will have to fend for himself this week.